How I got Started on Family Rights

I became active in reform back in 1997.  I was in the middle of an awful divorce and suddenly realized I didn’t have any rights to be a parent to my own child.  It was the most gut-wrenching experience I have ever been through.  As I told people, “if not for seeing it with my own eyes I wouldn’t have believed it possible.”  I was already doing websites and began to think how can we change this terrible system.

I’m a USAF Academy Graduate (’78) with a B.S. in Astronautical Eng. (rocket science) and became an Instructor Pilot in the T-37 jet.  After leaving the Air Force I picked up a Masters in Computer Science and had a long work career (resume).  Some things not on the official resume are 18 hours of Philosophy — when leaving the USAF I’d considered becoming a Catholic Priest and had entered a pre-seminary program.  Didn’t follow through, but it was a great experience.

I’d always enjoyed history, and recalled some books about the life of Martin Luther King,  Gandhi, and St. Francis of Assisi.   I found so many parents angry, bitter, and wanting to fight the system (including myself!) — but I realized this wasn’t a war, but a struggle for Civil Rights. If we could demonstrate loving self-sacrifice, NonViolent Action, we could achieve the recognition and protection of Family Rights.

It took a lot of Faith!  I’d never been in trouble with the law.  Even with a military background and  some very tough POW training,   being handcuffed & jailed the first time was quite an experience!  Something I’ve repeated over 45 timesHonestly, the way we treat prisoners in our jails is a disgrace (similar to divorce, until it happened to me, I didn’t realize how bad it was).

Most hear conscience as the nagging voice that stops us from doing something ‘bad’ — but more importantly, we should think of it as wanting us to do what is ‘good’.  For many, we describe the feeling we had when a Court Order stepped between us & our kids — as having our hearts ripped out. Not just one day, but each and every day.

Why? A Court blocking a moral imperative, an obligation of conscience. What of our duty as parents to love and nurture our children? When we talk about GREAT Civil Rights — don’t they all come from the same foundation? The freedom to follow and act according to our conscience? Our Freedom of Speech, Freedom of Religion, our Personal Liberty? What of the Freedom to Love our Children?  Public ‘policy’ should NOT block duties of conscience.

Can we please stop looking for Scientific Studies that support equal parenting?  We diminish ourselves and our GREAT right when we do that.  From my past NonViolent Actions I have had the chance to spend quite a bit of time in jail holding cells with other people who were just arrested. I can tell you that 90% of them were exactly guilty of what the police charged them with (if not worse acts).

Would you support a ‘law’ that said anyone charged with a crime should just be convicted then & there? Do we really want to run the risk of letting these dangerous people hurt other innocents? Let’s not forget OJ? Better safe than sorry! Why do have a presumption of innocence, require trials, and require a unanimous jury verdict?

Because we are about to take someones Freedom. We are about to interfere with a GREAT right. Should not the same level of attention be required before we can’t express the love we have for our children?

It’s been a long time since America has seen a grass roots Civil Rights movement. Before we see serious reform, it will need to see another. As parents we need to act in ways that will change the heart of the Nation if we want to see a Family Rights Act passed. An Act that will recognize & protect our ability to love and nurture our kids — just as our conscience calls for.

John Murtari

Organizer at AKidsRight, Inc.
John is on the Board of Directors for the group and has been active in reform effort for over 20 years and originally started the AKidsRight.Org group.His specialty is NonViolent Action

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Author: John Murtari

John is on the Board of Directors for the group and has been active in reform effort for over 20 years and originally started the AKidsRight.Org group. His specialty is NonViolent Action

2 thoughts on “How I got Started on Family Rights”

  1. Wow, I completely agree with you. Their should be something done about this family law system. It is completely unjust im every way possible. I am an ERASED MOTHER, it has been a very long 8 years now but it is a battle I will continue to fight till my children are back with me. I would love to take part in some form of Huge Civil Rights Movement to be honest to see that mot only my own children and myself but also all those that have gone and are going through these same things as my children amd I are, never happens any more or even ever again. My Goals once I have graduated college is to see to this Law in not only in Arkansas become a reality but as well as Nationally and I will see to it be something so great that their will be no way no person on this earth wouldn’t know of. The devastation and destruction that is caused from Parental Alienation should be called Child Abuse in our Legal System. No person should be allowed to get away with even the slightest form of this Type of Abuse. It’s most definitely an Evil all in its self and one that I would give my last breath amd heart beat for to see to it that no child or parent ever has to experience anything close to what my children amd I have gone through.
    Thank you for taking the time to read this, it is greatly appreciated.

    Please spread the word to

    I Fight for my children,
    My #JKPB one day soon my four will be back with me where they belong.

    Tiffany Baker

  2. “Honestly, the way we treat prisoners in our jails is a disgrace (similar to divorce, until it happened to me, I didn’t realize how bad it was).”

    1. (EX-)PRO DEATH PENALTY advocate until the botched lethal injections made an offender gasp for air for over an hour. Until DNA proved the guys senatencced to death row really were telling the truth about their innocence…but we the problem is…. the poor man was already executed!!!

    2. FIND THE DEADBEAT DADDY’S-HANG ‘UM!! said the little girl inside of me that grew up naming her roaches she kept as pets and eating moldy bread, ahile mom kaid passed out drunk on the couch…. because my sperm donor apparently wanted a boy (He ran off with a lady that already had one), and never looked back at his only bio-child to see if she was ok.

    Then I met a poor dad, who’s constitutional rights were completely obliterated by the local child support agency that filed a paternity action knowing full well the applicant and repsondent are legally married to each other. The agency intentio ally filed paternity action to treat it as if it were an out of wed lock case because neither the non tanf applicant or the respondent have any other cases open in family court to request; dissolution, legal separation, anullment or a temporary custody order or agreement for the child born during the marriage!!

    The corruption is palpable within department of child support services, and though ecidence has been submitted for them to redress the maTTer…..they pass the buck because they know tgey scewed up and cost this man precious time with his kids.

    How do we find a pro bono attorney to file action in family court though? This man nearly died March 2016 and is on a kidney transplant list…even knowing that and requesting modification of orders ss he was making 45% less than what he was ehen matter was ruked….the LCSA kept kifking bsck the income and expense form becaus3 he didnt pit anything on the top left stto ey box….he wss hooked to dialysis machine for 3 1/2 hours every other day….he isnt well enough to drive the 4 hours north to their office for help with the forms…and kept denying his request for 13 months, until i took over his case.

    He explained to the worker assigned to their case how badly he needed the modification. We needed the reduction to allow him enkugh money to afford to pay the filing fees to pursue custody orders to stop the wife from contsnt interference with custodial time.

    (the worker’s question to him was so unethical that i had to stop and catch my breath…and remember that I am a Christian woman. I took a deep breath and bowed my head down to PRAY…

    “Lord PLEASE give me patience . . . Because, if you give me strength, I’m gonna need bail money to go with it.”

    As much as they violated and they know they violated his constitutional rights….The worker
    Lana Vlady asked,

    “Well if you are now getting limited fixed income, how are you going to afford to get custody?”

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